its really quite a disgusting state of health i find myself in. i hate it. i hate coughing until my lungs feel like they're gonna pop, and i taste the coppery taste in my mouth. fuck. only 4 more days left to my birthday, and i'm feeling like shit ):

i must say, my birthday this year lacks that crazy hyped up feeling. maybe cos i'm sick/tired. maybe cos i'm missing ppl. maybe cos i've been so anti-social.

the leaves are falling everywhere. sometimes i just stare at the sky through the sparse branches of the trees and never want to walk away. when i'm here, i feel like there's so much to see, so much i haven't done. so many places in europe i want to see. but yet at the same time, there's so much back home that mean so much to me. conflicted.

hampstead heath next sunday anyone?